Own it.

I’m a complete disaster. I am. But I have found freedom in owning it. I have found freedom in being aware of my mood swings while experiencing them. I have come to LOVE not reacting. I have found a calm in knowing what causes my panic.

I used to be ashamed of what I went through. Embarrassed by my mental illness. And now I wear it with pride. I am healing. I am broken but I am beautiful. Healing, treatment… this isn’t easy. Every step is carefully placed and still there is no way of telling if the footing is right. But still I keep on.

I will tell anyone “I’m crazy. Like foh’reel crazy. I have D.I.D. Do you know what that is?!” Usually followed by “My life was like a season of SVU” insert giggle because let’s face it, I say ridiculous things and laugh. I can’t help it, I’ve heard it’s common in trauma survivors. You will often hear me explaining what BPD is and how there are literally portions of my brain that didn’t have the chance to develop correctly. Stating that “Right now I’m basically a toddler”

Own it.

That’s where I’m at today 🌻